This is the thirteenth in our series of interviews to deepen the connections between all of us who love the sea and Sea Soul Blessings. And today, we’re interviewing lovely Lorraine Wolstenholme. Lorraine talks about being widowed, avoiding the news, the search for peace and contentment, her feelings about ‘adulting’ – and the soothing power of the sea and Mother Nature in her life.
Tell us a little bit about you:
Hello, I’m Lorraine Wolstenholme. This year I celebrated my 60th Birthday at my home in Timperley, South Manchester.
I currently find myself in a chapter of life that I never thought would visit so early, if at all. I have been widowed for the last three years. The biggest challenge of my life!
I’m OK. After a great deal of self nurture and understanding of myself. It’s quite a shock to discover qualities about yourself that you never knew existed. The sea has played its part, as it has all my life.
I have a son called Ben who is 30 and married to the lovely Emma. My daughter Eve is 25 and is pivotal to my spiritual well-being. Together they are the brightest lights in my life.
What does nature, and the sea in particular mean to you ?
Nature is the balance for almost all events in life. Mother Nature provides if one looks hard enough.
The sea has played a role in my life from a very early age. As a child, I lived and prayed for holidays to arrive. Then I could walk the shoreline all day and every day.
I have collected her gifts of seashells since then and qualified as a ‘beachcomber’ a long time ago. Now landlocked in Manchester, my spirit still yearns – and I escape to the sea as often as I can.
“I truly believe that everyone needs the sight of the open horizon. The expanse of it makes one conscious of having the ability to breathe. The very strength and power of the water reduces worries to a more manageable size. The tide washes in and out………… and breathe.”
I have used this healing a great deal in the last three years.
How do you feel on a good day ?
Liberated. Anything is possible. Make it happen!
How do you feel on a bad day ?
Low low low.
…Lying under the duvet low – until tomorrow brings me a fresh start!
Who or what is inspiring you just now ?
“Mother Nature 🙂 She moves forward every day as a matter of course. She has to. Night to day. Season to Season. Tide to turning tide. She just keeps going.”
What do you worry about on a typical day ?
How? How do I do this? Me!
I look to my parents in their mid eighties, with all the difficulties that brings. I look to my Father-in-law of 93, God love him.
I support my incredibly talented daughter who lacks a belief in herself. It’s part of who she is – a wonderful, caring, loving spirit, almost vulnerable in this cut throat world. I wouldn’t want her to be any other way, so I am there as a sounding board when needed.
Looking after a house all on my own.
Salesmen, bank managers and tradesmen.
The younger generation have a new word for their modern dictionary – ‘Adulting’ 🙂 I like it. (Not the ‘adulting’ part – the term that sums it all up!)
Where do you find joy ?
A visit to the sea.
“To stand on the shore and let the essence of the sea just wash over me. The five senses completely healed with a salve of breathing in the ozone, taste of salty lips, the sand and water between my toes and the sight of the wider horizon. As if all troubles and worries are scaled down to their true smaller size.”
What do you love to do, read, watch or listen to ?
I have recently discovered painting and the art of decoupage. Occupations that have taken the place of reading.
I have not been able to read for any concentrated amount of time since my husband died. However, the art has soothed me a great deal.
I threw the television out, and stopped the papers. I have no patience for the way the news is presented.
News is one of the things I am very selfish about. I just look at the headlines on the news stand when I am in the supermarket. I just don’t need it. I don’t need to care about it because I have enough very important things to take care of. I can’t make a difference to world affairs, so my energies are spent with a cause I can contribute to: my family and friends.
What makes you cross ?
Injustice and unkind acts. It always seems to happen to the wrong people.
How do you look after yourself ?
I have had to learn how to do this.
Nobody else can do it for you, no matter how kind and helpful they may be. Looking after oneself is a conscious practice.
Once again, Mother Nature is the key – I eat healthily. I walk to take a regular intake of fresh air, and to ‘stop and stare’ as a famous poet once suggested. I sleep when my body is asking for more than the regular nightly dosage. I listen. Listen to my body, mind and soul and respond accordingly.
What would you most like to change about your life ?
I would ultimately like to move away and live within close proximity to the sea. I know deep down I would find the peace and contentment I’m searching for. I am currently researching this but there is a catch: my dearly beloved senior members of the family. I cannot leave them to fend for themselves. They need me on a regular basis , so for now I just visit the Sea for weekends 🙂
What have you learnt about life that you wish you’d understood earlier ?
“I’ve learnt that at this moment in time, there is no tomorrow. You really do only have now. So make the very most of it!”
How would you describe Sea Soul Blessings in three words ?
Mind Focusing Purpose
How do you use Sea Soul Blessing cards? What do they help you manage ?
I randomly select a Sea Soul Blessing every morning, sometimes it is amazingly relevant to current events – uncanny!
I use that blessing as an awareness of how I progress through my day.
If someone was thinking about trying Sea Soul Blessings, how would you encourage them ?
I would encourage them by discussing the positive effect of using these beautiful little cards. Especially when life can become difficult, and we just need some guidance or focus to steady our minds.
The Sea Soul Blessings are a very good tool to calm the frenetic behaviour of emotional reactions. In addition, they make a very good gift for someone close who may be struggling.
Plus, if you cannot find a way to purchase any, then there are online facilities in local libraries, where you can access the Sea Soul Blessings website and look at the post Pippa has put up that day.
To get yourself or those you love some Sea Soul Blessings, head here.
If you love the sea as much as we do, and would like to try some Sea Soul Blessings for free – join our Big Sea Giveaway. Every entrant wins a prize, and there are some really lovely prizes!
You might also enjoy the other interviews in the Sea Soul Community series so far:
Pippa
Pip
Lucy
Loveday
Alaya
Loran
Wendy
Sheila
Georgia
Swazi
Madeline
Angela